Episode 53: Escape From Old Court Castle (A Faerie Tale)
Escape From Old Court Castle '''is the fifty-third episode in the series and the eighth in A Faerie Tale. The Band of Boobs formulate a plan to rescue Queen Cirilla and escape Old Court! Moonshine cooks up a Chosen kebab, Hardwon executes "Operation: Lactose Lad," and Beverly makes his papa proud. Plot Synopsis '''Battle Planning The Band of Boobs are beaten up, low on spells, and still without Queen Cirilla. They find themselves in an abandoned residential district in the old underground city with The Hounds on their trail. Balnor, pumped to fight the drow that killed his family in the other timeline, wants to take them head on, but Moonshine suggests they hide and wait. Beverly IV, in a moment of calm, grabs The Boobs for a hug and ushers them into a house. He informs them that he hid Queen Cirilla in the castle, but it's guarded by Chosen angels and foot soldiers. Then, he explains that he asked a favor from the old queen, Isalyn The Sunmother, who is guarding Cirilla at the old queen’s memorial site. Bev Sr. is unsure of how they’ll get past The Chosen and the Unseelie Fey, but Moonshine informs him that the little Ghost Eladrin, Terreath, knows about a secret transporter inside the castle. Considering the fact that The Hounds will arrive soon, The Boobs decide to make for the main throne room to find Cirilla. Bev Sr. asks Terreath where the transporter is, and she writes the word “chamber” in the dust. Hardwon pops his head out the door to take a look at the castle’s defenses and sees a lot of activity surrounding it. Bev Sr. suggests that there are so many guards because they saw him run in, and so they probably sent angels out to look for him. They decide to take a Short Rest before heading out. Black Berets and Turtlenecks The Boobs sneak through the residential area with ease as they approach the castle. Once they get toward the northern part of the city they hide behind a large barracks building, now close to the castle. Beverly asks Terreath if there are any secret passages, and she points toward the tower to the left of the main gate, where there is only one angel overhead. They approach the front left tower and spot a window, which the angel flies into. Bev Stealths up to the drawbridge and looks into the water, but sees nothing. He swims across the moat and peaks into the window, spotting a small stone room, a doorway to the throne room, a stone staircase descending down, and two footmen holding a barrel containing wine. The rest of the party sneaks up to the window, and Bev casts Minor Illusion to create a fake nude magazine to distract The Chosen foot soldiers. He drops the magazine in window, to which the footmen investigate, and are immediately murdered by Balnor and Moonshine. The party enters the castle and decide to peak into the throne room. There are faded banners with The Summer Court symbol, great windows, and a mossy overgrowth that masks the overturned throne room as it is being searched by Chosen soldiers. At the end of the room on the throne sits a plant sculpture of the former queen. Moonshine’s Summer Court pendant that she received from Cran begins to glow softly and she knows in her heart that the queen is beneath the throne. Bev takes a few steps down the stairs, and finds that it’s a wine cellar. Hardwon dons armor from one of the defeated footmen in order to disguise himself. A single foot soldier approaches the room and asks if anyone is destroying the wine, but Hardwon swings his hammer into the soldier’s face, killing him instantly. Moonshine Stealths into the throne room, where there are nine soldiers, a few of which are inspecting the throne. She successfully evades the soldiers’ attention and gets the lay of the room. Moonshine moves upstairs to the second floor to search for the transporter, but firstly finds a regular guest bedroom. Hardwon enters the throne room as a disguised Chosen soldier and distracts nine foot soldiers and two angels by Deceiving them of finding a cask of milk. He convinces some of the foot soldiers to follow him, and he jumps out a window with the fake cask of wine. The angels are suspicious of him, and follow after as well. Bev enters the throne now that The Chosen are gone, and a vine reveals Cirilla’s body beneath the throne. An angel enters as this happens, but the halfling successfully stays stealthed near the throne. He sneaks past the guard vines and tells Cirilla that it’s time to go. The vine, who he assumes is the spirit of Isalyn, greets him and parts the roots to reveal Cirilla. She is placed in Bev’s arms, and Bev Sr. and Balnor help him usher her to the bedroom where Moonshine is. Hardwon, now surrounded by footmen, cracks open the keg to reveal the wine and blows the ghost pirate horn. At this moment, Moonshine notices foot soldiers rush outside at the sound of the horn. Nine ghost pirates appear at Hardwon’s side, and he fills their goblets with wine. He runs off, but not before swinging his hammer at Hector. Escape From The Sun Castle They all reconvene in the upper left tower, and engage some Chosen soldiers. Moonshine rages, and rolls two Nat 20s. She uses this to cleave through four soldiers. The party has a long exhausting battle against angels and foot soldiers, but successfully defeat them and rush to escape with Cirilla. They make it to a puzzle room where paintings are located on the wall, and Moonshine attempts to jump through a painting, revealing it’s not a portal and rather a cabinet door. They all jump through and enter the transporter behind the painting. The episode ends. Quotes * "Brothers, Thiala has blessed us! This cask was full of milk!" - Hardwon Surefoot * "Kaplam, Kaplow, milk-I mean-fruit of the cow!" - Moonshine Cybin * "Jules, Jim, and even Hector, come partake in the nipple nectar!" - Moonshine Cybin * "When my ilk do have a whim, we drink so deep the milk of skim." - Beverly Toegold V * “Gather round now boys we’re feeling fine, come and have a sip of wine!” - Hardwon Surefoot. Trivia * Up top the gang talks about Chode Sodes and Thick Sodes for the first time Music and Sound Effects * "Fantastic & Fuddling" by Emily Axford. * "Sea Beast" by Emily Axford. * "A Haven Away From Home" by Emily Axford. * "The Sultan of Stone" by Emily Axford. * "Spooky Shafts" by Emily Axford. * "Court of the Boy King" by Emily Axford. * "Escape the Boy King's Brunch" by Emily Axford. External Links * Headgum * Spotify * NADDPod Subreddit Thread Category:A Faerie Tale Category:Season 1